We’d All Have Better Sex if We Knew about Emotional Safety
If I knew and understood emotional safety, sex would be different for me. The current online discussions where cis-hetero men pontificate about the lack of sexual depth from cis women is a key factor of why understanding emotional safety is of utter importance.
You not gon’ get the “freak” if they don’t feel safe.
The amount of people remiss from this notion boggles my mind; yet, is unsurprising. Because who taught us about emotional safety? No one, as it relates to sex. We all learned about it later in life, though many of us haven’t grasped it.
What does it mean to be “emotionally safe?”
While it seems the obvious answer is comfort, I believe emotional safety goes beyond that.
For me, it encompasses vulnerability and transparency without fear of judgment or ridicule. Sharing intimate space without pause or hesitance. Being able to express oneself unrestricted. The space as a container of confidence allows parties to share secrets without hesitation, causing walls to break down.. A sacred and clandestine environment filled with care, respect, empathy, and love.
Refuge such as this is impossible when the demand to perform “As Seen on TV” theatrics supersedes intimate connection? Performance expectations of both…
